A Skunk-y Year

When Doug and I got married it was during Christmas. December 30, 1995. My sweet aunties (from out of town) really wanted to throw a shower for the two of us when they arrived in Berkeley that wedding weekend.. I loved and appreciated the thought, but it was only two days before the wedding! I was really self-conscious about the idea of people feeling like they had to give us a shower gift, let alone only days before the know...and then giving a wedding gift! Awkward. The solution? We decided to do a Christmas Ornament shower theme! It was fantastic. And we STILL treasure the ornaments people gave to us TWENTY SIX YEARS ago!

It turns out, I love Christmas ornaments. We've collected more throughout the years. And even the most ugly, non-sentimental ones...I can't seem to part with them! Because there's always a memory. A story. An experience, a person attached. What are your favorite ornaments? What memories do they evoke? (Share them with us!)

This year we received two of my new favorite ornaments. I mean can't get more on-point, appropriate Christmas ornaments. This has been a year, 2021.

From one of our favorite health care warriors we received this decorative tree fixture:

Do you see what it is? YES..It's a vaccine vial...a fictitious, empty one of course. (Side note: you feel like Covid-19 is endless? IMAGINE being a health care worker, on the FRONTLINES... caring for people of all types, including those who REFUSE TO GET VACCINATED? Those who's "RIGHTS" put so many at risk?) Wow, to be in the trenches of health care takes deep soul searching, resilience and GRACE. Thank you to all our front line warriors. We are ever indebted....and I vow to do my best to support you!

And then, some of my other favorite empaths sent us this:

They realize it's been a "skunk-y" year for us KK's, just like they too, have had in the past. This is such a sweet and playful acknowledgment of a moment in time. Our time, our year of struggle, grief and floundering. It will pass, but now every year as I pull out this ornament I'll know. And remember. And be so grateful for our empathetic friends who see us. Hugs.

So now it is January 17, 2022. A whole new year. So my question for you is, how do you move into a new year? Do you make resolutions? (have they already come and gone?) Or do you steer away from that idea "resolutions" and instead keep moving forward? What does 2022 mean to you?

So, full age 53... I've approached a new year, the NEW YEAR from almost every angle. From new resolution to no resolution, from new diet to no diet, from new me to now me...and so on and so on...

Will this year be any different? (Ok, I did try a diet starting in November. It didn't work. I still felt like a failure by January 1, before the new year even got a chance to begin.)

So I'm trying something new. I'm changing my thoughts. The usual ones of "you should __" "you need to ___" "why don't you ____" "why are you so ____" "shoulda, woulda, coulda"

they aren't working for me anymore. In fact, I don't think they ever worked for me.

INSTEAD, I'm working on my thoughts. My self-judgment (which is so mean, by the way..I would NEVER say to a friend what I say to myself. Are you with me? Oh, I'm so mean....) My inner critic be damned. And, I'm focusing on other things. Overshadowing the negative with positive. Because WHY NOT? For years the negative about myself through my self talk has overshadowed the positive. So....I'm giving this a go.

Here's what I wrote in my journal on January 12: (full disclosure I'm feeling a little vulnerable)

It feels counter-intuitive and like bragging to write this. To share this. It's not my usual thought process. Usually I prefer self-punishment and degrading self-talk to keep myself in line and in check. But why would I ever think that would be helpful, caring, let alone motivating and/or productive? I don't know why. But that's my usual go to. How about you?

But...not this New Year 2022. Kindness. In thought and...yes...only thought for my new GO-TO resolution for myself. Changing my thoughts in hope it leads to new and, in turn kind feelings and in turn, action.

My amazing child has been wanting me to draw with them. Intimidated, I don't know what to draw. I'm not an artist. I have no creativity. (Or so I told myself...see? Proof of the pattern of negative self-talk right there! ha!) So I decided what I could do was to color my journal thoughts. I came up with this:

and then this

Darlings...amazing, talented fellow humans! May your thoughts about you be kind, too. YOU ARE! All of this and more! Will you please come up with your own "I AM" statement? Would you be willing to share it with me? With us? YOU ARE beautiful, powerful, amazing and so much more.

Skunk-y matter what the world brings...there is YOU! And there is learning, beauty, processing and joy! Blessings for and to you this new year.

Love, peace and light channeled your way today and everyday.


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